Not sure if this should be written here, But I need a place to write it down so I can keep it for a longer time like a diary or a blog. So...
My dad passed away, my dear dear dad who I took care for day in and day out for 10 years passed away this Friday. He was just like sleeping baby when he gone. And I must say.. it was the only thing we convinced ourselves that we should let him go.
This sadness is much much heavier than what I had thought many many times before...
Yes, I thought it might be a part of relief to let go of this heavy burden, but I don t feel that way now, I actually feeling now is painful and empty.
I miss him more than I can imagine, it is unbearable! However, I have make up my mind to allow myself to keep this deep miss for as long as possible, until I feel it is enough ... or the time when I have no more tears.